We'll All Be Chicks

I bought my brother Adam Corolla’s In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks for Christmas. Hilarious stuff, and probably true.

Take the case of the NFL, the No Fun League. Growing up we played football in rain and mud, and if it weren’t the Southwest desert I lived in, would have played in sleet and snow. We grew up watching college and pro-football played in the worst conditions possible. Freezing sleet and snow, a gazillion degrees below zero, foot deep mud, and that was the game; play no matter what. Then came indoor football on fake turf. We all bemoaned that.

This past Sunday I turned on the game at 5 PM, and it was canceled due to snow. WTF!?!?!? A football game? It was expected to snow a whole 11 inches! Oh well then, lets all go home and get in our snuggles! The Minnesota Vikings can’t play in a snow storm any more? I appreciate the skill and the pain those great big guys womping on each other experience, but really, what a bunch of wimps. (I’ve done a lot of major dangerous manly stuff so I have the pedigree to call ‘em wimps, I don’t care how big their muscles are.)

Speaking of which, in addition to being ‘fraidy cats, do they know when they make all those booty shakin’ moves after a touchdown how gay they look? Just shut up gay people, you know what I mean.  

Fans in Green Bay sit in what? Screamin’ ice storms! Horizontal snow! So freakin' cold the thermometers shiver. The fans are tougher than the woosies taking to the field; and they can’t run around and keep the blood flowing.  Bud Grant, who used to coach the Vikings when the NFL had real men, didn’t let his players use hand warmers no matter how cold.  

I guess now snuggles should be part of the equipment issue. Good grief.

Hat tip for my tirade. Will Bunch article here.